Try the Purina diet

Jokebox

Jibs so far:: 50

Jabs so far:: 9

I used to have a Labrador retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina
at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I
had a dog(?).
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina
Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is
nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, black guy who was behind
her.
Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no; I'd been
sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought the
black guy was going to have to stagger out the door.

Uploaded by: kcityroller

Category: Other & Random

Date: 07/25/06

Description:

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by acwalker48 Tue Jul 25 11:28:30 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

OMG! i just spewed coke all over my desk. i breed siberians, and buy 200 lbs of food every 2 weeks, it amazes me how often people ask if i have a dog. No, the 4 50lbs. bags you see are for traction in the snow! :-|

by schlimme Tue Jul 25 14:00:44 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D >gasp!< :-D :-D :-D :-D

by mwvixen Fri Jul 28 13:21:55 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-* Great answer! Now i'll have to come up with one for when i'm buying iguana food!

by schlimme Fri Jul 28 14:00:20 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

8-| :-D :-D :-D love it! :-*

by knytflyer Fri Jul 28 15:29:52 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

I'm with the tall guy in line -- almost fell off my chair laughing :-D :-D :-D

by fcc Fri Jul 28 15:36:24 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

im with the tall guy :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

by sheri3 Sat Jul 29 07:47:04 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

ha ha :-D

by ZATTAZ Sat Jul 29 09:11:41 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D OH YES BROOKBOND007 HAS YOU ON VIDEO. YOU ARE EAGER TO PLEASE!!!! OH YES YOU ARE!!!! OH YES HE HAS!!!! :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

by rpcarr Sat Jul 29 04:44:13 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

funnnnnnnnnny

by savfaad Sat Jul 29 11:41:24 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-D :-D ;-)

by tnsilverlady Sat Jul 29 16:55:56 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-O funny..... :-D :-D :-D

by megsterrr Sun Jul 30 07:22:00 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

:-D :-D :-D It's so funny that you, myself and Daddywags all posted this .... but it's great to keep seeing over and over ... great minds think alike!! ;-) :-D :-D :-D

by debster Sun Jul 30 08:01:49 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)