2 tough questions

Jokebox

Jibs so far:: 120

Jabs so far:: 15

Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids
already, three who were deaf, two who were blind,
one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would
you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the
response for this one.

Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only
your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three
candidates.

Candidate A.
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults
with astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also
chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B.
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until
noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of
whiskey every evening.

Candidate C
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian,
doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never
cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be our choice?
Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the
response.

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion
question: If you said YES, you just killed
Beethoven.

Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think
before judging someone.
Wait till you see the end of this note! Ke ep
reading..

Never be afraid to try something new.
Remember: Amateurs...built the ark.
Professionals...built the Titanic

And Finally, can you imagine working for a company
that has a little more than 500 employees and has
the following statistics:
* 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
* 7 have been arrested for fraud
* 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
* 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at
least 2 businesses
* 3 have done time for assault
* 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
* 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
* 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
* 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
* 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the
last year...

Can you guess which organization this is?

Give up yet?

It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.
The same group that crank out hundreds of new laws each year
designed to keep the rest of us in line.

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Uploaded by: Lazer

Category: Politics & Government

Date: 05/09/06

Description:

Comments (Add Comment)

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by anonamus Tue May 09 15:21:20 PDT 2006 (2 years ago)

Ok, I like it, but about the ark thing and the abortian thing, back in the time of beethoven, that sort of thing was pretty common relative to today, and with the ark, if you are refering to the biblical ark, there is no real evidence that it actually exsited. Other than those two, I like it alot!

by roxy_babe_345 Sun Jul 01 11:32:46 PDT 2007 (10 months ago)

um...i have proof that the ark exsited...um its called THE BIBLE!

by taco roll Sat Jul 22 22:30:36 PDT 2006 (22 months ago)

the dude under neith me is stupid and needs to get out more it was all great :-) :-) :-)

by megsterrr Fri Sep 01 18:43:04 PDT 2006 (20 months ago)

EEEEEEEEK!! Kinda freaky stuff. Sorry 'bout the way this looks ... I thought I spaced it out better!!

by barbikins Fri Sep 01 22:00:24 PDT 2006 (20 months ago)

8-| Wow! That gets ya thinkin'!

by daddywags3 Sat Sep 02 19:31:05 PDT 2006 (20 months ago)

Gulp! :-O :-O 8-|

by tomyolch Mon Sep 04 13:57:28 PDT 2006 (20 months ago)

:-O :-O YIKES!!! :-D :-D :-D

by rotsky Mon Oct 23 09:41:47 PDT 2006 (19 months ago)

Very funny, except that the Beethoven gag is nonsense. It's a story trotted out a lot on the web, usually by anti-abortion cretins. Fact is, Beethoven was the eldest child and his mother didn't have syphilis (she died of TB, quite common then). Still, why let truth spoil a good joke, eh?

by tnsilverlady Thu Oct 26 08:43:35 PDT 2006 (18 months ago)

:-) :-) :-) oh my....you're kidding.... hehehehe.... good one....lol..... let's try some different ones....and hope they do better... :-D :-D :-D

by NoReally Sat Mar 24 10:40:50 PDT 2007 (13 months ago)

It's also not true that Hitler was a vegetarian. He was a big eater of Bavarian stews which had plenty of prime beef.

by wrinkling Thu May 17 20:37:52 PDT 2007 (12 months ago)

there is evidence of the Bibical ark the joke was fun and I said Hitler yikes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not good......I did not give the abortion thought......

by dbaiboz Sun May 27 02:36:53 PDT 2007 (11 months ago)

Not Bad at all

by base Wed May 30 18:28:26 PDT 2007 (11 months ago)

i did not get that?

by ando Fri Jun 29 16:33:06 PDT 2007 (10 months ago)

DANG IT.

by bonbartender Tue Aug 28 00:42:21 PDT 2007 (8 months ago)

kind of tough on the abortion policy, whoever made this one up, must be a narrow-minded man that of course can't give birth, get rid of this joke..

by Jib_Joker Thu Aug 30 17:00:12 PDT 2007 (8 months ago)

Just brilliant.

by kd5lih Wed Sep 12 21:19:36 PDT 2007 (8 months ago)

arc vs titanic: The arc was an overgrown lifeboat with no propulsion system and no rudder, and was destroyed due to striking a mountain. The titanic had watter tight compartments configured like an ice cube tray but without a center divider, had a steam piston powered screw propeller fed from coal fueled boilers, a tiny rudder, 1 pair of binoculars, no radar, a jerk for a radio officer, a hull made of sub standard steel, half a load of lifeboats, and was destroyed by a slow leak that could have been handled by a small bilge pump.

by Rixar13 Fri Oct 05 19:29:02 PDT 2007 (7 months ago)