The Broken Lawn Mower
 
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is usually the husband.
 
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed.  But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first: the truck, The car, email, 
fishing, always something more important to me. 

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.  When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors, in the buff, scratching her butt.  It must have been agony!

I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house, finding myself less attracted to this situation. I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.

'When you finish cutting the grass,' I said, 'you might as well sweep the driveway.' 

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.