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A male patient is lying in bed, with an oxygen mask coverig his mouth and nose, having just had a difficult four hour surgical procedure.

 
A young student nurse enters his room to give him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, sir, I'm only here to wash your upper body."

He struggles to ask again. "Nurse, are my testicles black!?"

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from the worry over his testicles, the nurse overcomes her embarrassment and sheepisly pulls back the covers. She raises his groin, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other; lifting and moving them around. Then, she takes a close look and says,  "There's nothing wrong with them, sir."

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, "Thank you very much.  That was wonderful; but listen very, very closely....

ARE- MY-TEST-RESULTS-BACK?"