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A small West Virginia Wild Animal Park had acquired a very rare

species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla

became very horny, and difficult to handle. Upon examination,

the park veterinarian determined the problem: The gorilla was

in heat. To make matters worse, there were no male gorillas

of her species available.

While reflecting on their problem, the park administrators

noticed Ed, a part-time redneck intern, responsible for

cleaning the animals' cages. Ed, like most rednecks, had little

sense, but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of ANY

species.

So, the park administrators thought they might have a solution.

Ed was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to

have sex with the gorilla for $100?

Ed showed some interest, but said he would have to think the

matter over carefully. The following day, Ed announced that

he would accept their offer, but only under three conditions.

"First," he said, "I don't want to have to kiss the gorilla."

"Second, you must never tell anyone about this."

The park administration quickly agreed to these conditions,

so they asked what was his third condition.

Ed stated, "You gotta give me another week to come up with

the hundred bucks."