Jokebox

911 dispatch

Jibs so far:
7
Jabs so far:
0
BELIEVE it or not , these are REAL 911 Calls!


Dispatcher
: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller:
I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher:
Do you have an address?
Caller:
No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?


Dispatcher
: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller
: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich
Dispatcher
: Excuse me?
Caller
: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher
: Was anything else taken?
Caller
: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!


Dispatcher:
9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach
nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher:
This is nine eleven .
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher:
Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.


My Personal Favorite!!!

Dispatcher:
9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller:
My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
Dispatcher:
Is this her first child?
Caller:
No, you idiot! This is her husband!

And the winner is..........


Dispatcher:
9-1-1
Caller:
Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn...I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher:
Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller:
I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: !
Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller:
No
Dispatcher:
What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller:
Running from the Police.ooo

bartendingdiva's Avatar
Uploaded by: bartendingdiva
Category: Other & Random
Date: 09/27/07
Views: 721
Description: real 911 calls

Haha

MONKEY BUSINESS
Title
MONKEY BUSINESS
Info
Length: 0:19 | Views: 20
Category
Category: Animals & Nature
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/07/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
0
4WD HILL CLIMBING VERY COOL
Title
4WD HILL CLIMBING VERY COOL
Info
Length: 0:34 | Views: 18
Category
Category: Sports & Stunts
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/07/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
0
FUNNY LOL TV
Title
FUNNY LOL TV
Info
Length: 0:59 | Views: 17
Category
Category: Pranks & Bloopers
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/07/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
0
EMPLOYEES HAVING FUN AT OFFICE
Title
EMPLOYEES HAVING FUN AT OFFICE
Info
Length: 1:15 | Views: 28
Category
Category: Commercials & Products
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/07/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
0
RETARDED GOALIES MUST WATCH FUNNY
Title
RETARDED GOALIES MUST WATCH FUNNY
Info
Length: 2:33 | Views: 269
Category
Category: Sports & Stunts
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
2
| Jabs:
1
FUNNY VIDEO MAN WITHOUT BRAKES
Title
FUNNY VIDEO MAN WITHOUT BRAKES
Info
Length: 1:08 | Views: 136
Category
Category: Pranks & Bloopers
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
1
HELP ME CARTOON
Title
HELP ME CARTOON
Info
Length: 1:35 | Views: 81
Category
Category: Cartoons & Comics
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
2
| Jabs:
2
RUSSIAN BAR TRICK
Title
RUSSIAN BAR TRICK
Info
Length: 1:31 | Views: 130
Category
Category: Sports & Stunts
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
1
| Jabs:
0
YOUTH VODAFONE COMMERCIAL KID GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING
Title
YOUTH VODAFONE COMMERCIAL KID GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING
Info
Length: 0:30 | Views: 69
Category
Category: Commercials & Products
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
2
| Jabs:
0
TROLLY -BC LIONS COMMERCIAL
Title
TROLLY -BC LIONS COMMERCIAL
Info
Length: 0:31 | Views: 88
Category
Category: Sports & Stunts
Submitter
B.O.R.G's Avatar
Uploaded by B.O.R.G on 10/06/08
Jibs:
3
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