Jibs so far:

2

Jabs so far:

1

THINGS I HAVE LEARNED WHILE LIVING IN LOUISIANA:
 
 
1. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air
 
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in LOUISIANA.
 
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in LOUISIANA, plus a couple no one's seen before.
 
4. If it grows, it sticks; If it crawls, it bites.
 
5. "Onced" and "Twiced" are words.
 
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
 
7. Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
 
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
 
9. "Fixinto" is one word.
 
10. There is no such thing as "lunch". There is only dinner and then there is supper.
 
11. Ice tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!
 
12. Backwards and forwards means "I know everything about you."
 
13. The word "Jeet" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
 
14. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you' re done or until it's too dark to see.
 
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.
 

 
YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM LOUISIANA IF:
 
1. You measure distance in minutes.
 
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day. ain't that the truth!
 
3. You use "fix" as a verb. For example: "I'm fixing to go to the store "
 
4. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
 
5. You install security lights on your house and garage, then leave both unlocked.
 
6. You know what a "DAWG" is.
 
7. You carry jumper cables in your car ...for your OWN car.
 
8. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony Chachere's, Tabasco and ketchup.
 
9. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
 
10. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
 
11. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit to be "a little warm".
 
12. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer and! Christmas.
 
13. You know whether another LOUISIANAN is from NEW ORLEANS, north or south as soon as they open their mouth.
 
14. Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as "goin' Wal-martin" or off to "Wally World" ...Mall Mart.
 
15. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good gumbo weather.
 
16. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop ...it's a Coke,
 regardless of brand or flavor. For example: "What kinda Coke you want?"
 
17. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
 
18. We don't need no stinking driver's ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive.
 
19. You understand these jokes and forward them to your friends from LOUISIANA (and those who just wish they were).

Not EVERYONE can be a LOUISIANAN, it's an art form and a gift from God! :)