MY RESUME:

Jokebox

Jibs so far:: 3

Jabs so far:: 0

MY RESUME:

My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

After that, I tried to be a Tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it --mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.

Then, I tried to be a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.

I attempted to be a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was a Musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. I tried but I just didn't fit in.

I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but it was just too draining.

So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.

My last job was working in Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.

SOOOOOOO.....

I TRIED RETIREMENT

AND FOUND THAT

I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB.

Man, Oh, man, do I enjoy it !!!!

TexarkanaBaby

Uploaded by: TexarkanaBaby

Category: Word Fun (Puns, Phrases)

Date: 03/27/07

Description:

Comments (Add Comment)

by hunterr0 Tue Mar 27 06:11:34 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

I tried to work as a firemen but I got hosed., I was a nurse and called all the shot., I wanted to be a lawyer, but my legal brief itched, etc. :-D

by Joker Tue Mar 27 07:58:30 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

:-( I wanted to be a baker, but my boss really took the cake. ( Sorry - B.C. - Before Coffee ) :-(

by cheysdad2 Tue Mar 27 10:55:00 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

Lily Tomlin once quoted: "If every boy and girl around the world became what they wanted to be growing up. The world would be full of: Cowboys, Firemen, Nurses, and ballerina."

by cheysdad2 Tue Mar 27 11:29:48 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

I once work for Mrs. Dash, but she garnish my wages. Then I worked at a laundermat, but my pay was laundered. I once worked at a supermarket, as a bagger, until I got saked. I once pretended to be a homeless blind man, until someone asked me for the time. I was also a pool hustler at a gay bar, but they 86 me, because I kept making to many straight shots.

by Schwarz Pferd Tue Mar 27 13:05:19 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

Dude, I have to write a resume for school tommorow, hello completed assignment.....

by tnsilverlady Tue Mar 27 13:47:57 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

:-O :-O WOW..... what a resume......lol.... :-D :-D :-D :-*

by Gimlet_Bob Tue Mar 27 13:52:13 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

I worked at a bakery because I kneaded the dough. ;-)

by tom,petty Tue Mar 27 17:07:41 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

haha, pretty funny, wonder what the boss would say if i really used this as my resume ;-)

by mileslong Tue Mar 27 18:33:19 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

How about your job baiting hooks, ya quit because you could never be a master baiter. :-D :-D

by Smelter Tue Mar 27 19:10:41 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)

"TexarkanaBaby will be her Monday thru Friday 9:00 w/ TWO shows on Saturday..... Don't forget to tip your waitress's and you all drive home safely"..... :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

by MarleneKG Tue Mar 27 21:44:23 PDT 2007 (20 months ago)