Jibs so far:

1

Jabs so far:

0

WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?" 

 CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

MORNING COFFEE
A man and his wife were having a discussion about who should brew the coffee each morning. The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here. so you should do it" Wife replies, "No, you should do it because it is in the Bible that the man should brew the coffee. Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.......... "HEBREWS"

Pssst!
A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat. She asked him if it was dead or alive."Dead." She was informed. "How do you know?" she asked her pupil."Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently."You did WHAT?!?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise."You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

DADDY
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room."A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."

THE SON OF A B-------.
A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a b* tch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a b* tch is nine...."His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom."......"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in math?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a b* tch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."